“Next to the perinatal center was the military commissariat, I looked out the window and saw a lot of our soldiers going to it. People started running on the street. I became very scared for our future. My first thought was: am I going to lose my child this time too?”

On February 24, 2022, around five o’clock in the morning, I woke up to the sounds of explosions. I was lying in a preserved pregnancy in the perinatal center of the city of Lutsk. This was my fourth pregnancy in the last 10 years. I failed to save three previous pregnancies. My husband and I tried to continue our lives and did not even dream that this time the child would come to us. But it happened. I felt mixed feelings – from happiness to fear – I didn’t know how I would be this time. And here I am, 7 weeks pregnant, waking up in the hospital from explosions outside the window because a war has started in my country. Next to the perinatal center was the military commissariat, I looked out the window and saw a lot of our soldiers going to it. People started running on the street. I became very scared for our future. My first thought was: am I going to lose my child this time too? The first trimester of pregnancy is very important and the most dangerous in terms of possible complications, which had already started in me at that time. That is why I was kept in the hospital. I heard the baby’s heartbeat on the ultrasound examination, I already fell in love with this child and tried to fight to the very end for her life.My doctor came to my ward and informed me that in connection with the beginning of the war, we should all be discharged home, as it was already very dangerous to be in the hospital. The Russian military bombed the Lutsk airport and oil bases located not far from our hospital. My husband came for me. We didn’t know what to do next. A few days later, the bombing of the city resumed. We realized that even being in Lutsk is dangerous. My husband began to insist that I leave Ukraine. Going from my native home in a state of pregnancy with complications to another country without my beloved husband – this plan seemed crazy to me.However, our family believes in God, we began to pray and ask for God’s blessing. People were leaving the city all the time. Since our city is located not far from the Polish border, it was not difficult to leave. I did not want to leave my husband alone, I wanted to go through the entire journey of our long-awaited pregnancy with him, however, considering the fact that there was a threat of miscarriage during the entire first trimester of pregnancy, in case of evacuation, I had to travel only in a lying position.Before the war, I worked as a physiotherapist and was involved in the rehabilitation of people with disabilities. One of my former patients wanted to go to Poland with her daughter and I offered to go with her as I wanted to help someone else. At the same time, a friend of mine, with whom we go to the same church, offered to help me with evacuation transportation. He had his own minibus with a bed for rest and would be able to take me to Poland. For me, it was the moment when I had to decide what to do next.I understood that the most important thing is to give birth to a healthy child, which means I have to leave no matter what. I have a plan. When I was a child, there was an organization in our church called the Scandinavian Children’s Mission. The head of this mission in Ukraine was a woman who was my neighbor. She helped organize children’s camps for Ukrainian children in Scandinavia. Thus, at the age of 13, I visited Sweden and Denmark. I really liked the city of Malmö, which we visited first, and when the question arose of where to go during the evacuation, I intuitively decided to go to this city.

On March 15, 2022, we left for Poland, where I stayed in a local church that provided shelter for Ukrainians, and fell ill with COVID during this period. During the week I recovered and continued to look for volunteers who could take me to Sweden. But everyone who went to Sweden only had passenger seats, and that didn’t suit me. I prayed every day and asked God to solve this issue for me. And so, one wonderful day, in the cafeteria of the church, I met a pastor from Latvia, who found out about my situation and offered me his help and drove me in his car, which had space just so that I could drive in a lying position .Thus, on March 26, 2022, I and my friend and my daughter arrived in Sweden. The first town we stopped in was Tomelilla, where we were given shelter in the local church. My friend and my daughter stayed in this city, and I had to go further as I was looking for the best hospital where I could be registered considering the specifics of my pregnancy. I needed special actions from the doctors to save my child. Such procedures were carried out in Malmö and Lund. One of my Ukrainian acquaintances, who lives in Malmö, found a Swedish family who agreed to give me shelter in their home for a while.I lived in this family for a month and a half, but I wanted to get my own home as my child was soon to be born. I applied to the Migration Service on May 24, 2022, with a request to provide me with separate housing. I was accommodated in a migration hotel, where I lived for three and a half months until I was given a separate room in a dormitory in the city of Malmö.Volunteers helped me a lot during this period. I came with a small backpack on my back and had no clothes, no shoes, no things for the child. Everything I needed was helped by the volunteers who worked in the Malmö Helps organization and the Swedish believers who were parishioners of the Europaporten/Klädhjelpen (Malmös Pingstförsamling) church that I started attending in Malmö. Not only did I get clothes and groceries from them, I got support and hugs from them, which I really missed.

At the end of August 2022, I moved into a dormitory. The administration treated me very well and gave me a nice room near the elevator and the laundry room so that it would be easier for me to cope with the baby when it is born. I felt safe there. I finally have my own little place where I can live and wait for our baby to arrive.On September 9, 2022, my husband was able to come to me for three weeks. He is a volunteer with the Ukrainian church and could still go abroad to buy humanitarian aid, which the chaplains of the church then took to the east of Ukraine to give free of charge to all those who needed it. I went through the whole pregnancy alone. All the experiences and emotions about this entire 9-month period I had to live without him. I was very supported during this period by my midwife, who gave me maximum attention. But I wanted to be with my husband at least during the birth of our child. We prayed that it would happen precisely on his arrival.And so, on September 21, 2022, at 05:26 in the morning, our son Lev was born. We were incredibly happy at that point in our lives. It was God’s blessing and a long-awaited miracle for us. My husband stayed with us for a few more days and had to return to Ukraine. I was afraid of being without him and was sad about it. I understood that I would be alone again with a small child in my arms and I did not know when I would see my husband again or if I would see him at all. Living in parallel worlds is very difficult. When you check your phone and the news all the time, you see where a rocket fell in Ukraine and what another drone attack destroyed in your city, where your relatives were at that time.Mom, who is already in her seventies, has to receive attention, so my husband is currently torn between work, volunteering and helping our parents. On the other hand, I am responsible for the child and I did everything I could. My days were more like the automatic actions of an exhausted woman. I fed the child, bathed, walked, then fed again, put him to bed, napped for ten minutes and again fed, washed, carried him in my arms when he cried.I remember our first Christmas in the hostel. I was looking out the window, a child was lying in my arms, it was snowing outside, I was crying from the feeling of loneliness. Sometimes I look back at the path I have traveled and think that I would not be able to walk it again. Only thanks to my faith and God’s help, which was expressed in various aspects, I was able to overcome all this. God has no hands other than ours.And indeed, there were always people around who offered me help. Both Swedes and Ukrainians who lived nearby. Sometimes they brought me cooked food, sometimes they bought groceries, someone brought clothes for the baby. I accepted everything with gratitude.

At the moment, my son is already one year and four months old. We continue to live in a hostel in the city of Malmö. I am considering putting Leo in kindergarten and want to start looking for a job. I love medicine and everything related to it. Before the birth of my child, I devoted a lot of time to my activities as a physiotherapist.I gave one hundred percent and was happy when I saw the result of my work. I have come a long way in the medical field, I started as an operating room nurse, and later I was the director of a rehabilitation center in the city of Lutsk. I would like to be useful here in Sweden. I know for sure that I will be able to manifest in the best way.To date, Ukraine has increased restrictions on the departure of male persons of conscription age abroad. And even volunteers have big problems crossing the border. Therefore, I do not know when I will be able to see my husband again. The last time he came to us was on Christmas 2023. Behind the difficult path we were able to walk, ahead is the unknown, which is frightening and exhausting, but I trust God and his plan for our destiny and family. We can overcome everything. I believe that one day we will be reunited like every loving family that dreams of living life together.

Original text in Ukrainian – Olena Andryeyenkova.